1.
Tiger Woods shocks the gas station attendant when he says thisThe pump attendant obviously knows nothing about golf, greets him in a typical Irish manner completely unaware of who the golfing pro is“Top of the mornin' to yer, Sir” says the attendant.Tiger
Tiger Woods shocks the gas station attendant when he says thisThe pump attendant obviously knows nothing about golf, greets him in a typical Irish manner completely unaware of who the golfing pro is“Top of the mornin' to yer, Sir” says the attendant.Tiger
2.
… he announces, his wife has just produced a typical Texas baby boy weighing 25 poundsThe man buys a round of drinks as his wife just gave birth to typical Texas baby boy weighing 25 poundsCongratulations showered him from all around, and many exclamation
… he announces, his wife has just produced a typical Texas baby boy weighing 25 poundsThe man buys a round of drinks as his wife just gave birth to typical Texas baby boy weighing 25 poundsCongratulations showered him from all around, and many exclamation
3.
“What a wonderful Easter day! Today, I'm so happy, I'll even be nice to the nuns”, she said.She went out of her room and saw a nun in the hall.– Good morning, Sister Joanna! You look really beautiful today! And that shirt you're knitting is so pretty!– Th
“What a wonderful Easter day! Today, I'm so happy, I'll even be nice to the nuns”, she said.She went out of her room and saw a nun in the hall.– Good morning, Sister Joanna! You look really beautiful today! And that shirt you're knitting is so pretty!– Th
4.
Dog’s Letters to God
Dear God:
How come people love to smell flowers, but seldom smell one another? Where are their priorities?
When we get to Heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it the same old story?
Excuse me, but why are there cars nam
Dog’s Letters to God
Dear God:
How come people love to smell flowers, but seldom smell one another? Where are their priorities?
When we get to Heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it the same old story?
Excuse me, but why are there cars nam
5.
A passenger in a taxi leaned over to ask the driver a question and gently tapped him of the shoulder to get his attention.The driver screamed, lost control of the cab, nearly hit a bus, drove up over the curb and stopped just inches from a large plate-gla
A passenger in a taxi leaned over to ask the driver a question and gently tapped him of the shoulder to get his attention.The driver screamed, lost control of the cab, nearly hit a bus, drove up over the curb and stopped just inches from a large plate-gla
6.
On their first date, a man asked his companion if she'd like a drink with dinner.“Oh, no, what would I tell my Sunday school class?” she said.Later, he offered her a cigarette.“Oh, no, what would I tell my Sunday school class?” she said again On the drive
On their first date, a man asked his companion if she'd like a drink with dinner.“Oh, no, what would I tell my Sunday school class?” she said.Later, he offered her a cigarette.“Oh, no, what would I tell my Sunday school class?” she said again On the drive
7.
Two bachelors are talking and their conversation drifts from politics to cooking.“I got a cookbook last Christmas,” says the first, “but I was never able to do anything with it.”“Too much fancy cooking in it, eh?” asks the second.“You said itEvery one of
Two bachelors are talking and their conversation drifts from politics to cooking.“I got a cookbook last Christmas,” says the first, “but I was never able to do anything with it.”“Too much fancy cooking in it, eh?” asks the second.“You said itEvery one of
8.
A 98-year-old Mother Superior from Ireland was dying.The nuns gathered around her bed trying to make her last journey comfortable.They tried giving her some warm milk to drink but she refused it.One of the nuns took the glass back to the kitchen and remem
A 98-year-old Mother Superior from Ireland was dying.The nuns gathered around her bed trying to make her last journey comfortable.They tried giving her some warm milk to drink but she refused it.One of the nuns took the glass back to the kitchen and remem
9.
Four married guys go fishingAfter an hour, the following conversation took place:First guy: “You have no idea what I had to do to be able to come out fishing this weekendI had to promise my wife that I will paint every room in the house next weekend.”Seco
Four married guys go fishingAfter an hour, the following conversation took place:First guy: “You have no idea what I had to do to be able to come out fishing this weekendI had to promise my wife that I will paint every room in the house next weekend.”Seco
10.
A woman goes to her boyfriend’s parents’ house for dinner.
This is her first time meeting the family and she is very nervous.
They all sit down and begin eating a fine meal.
The woman is beginning to feel a little discomfort, thanks to her nervou
A woman goes to her boyfriend’s parents’ house for dinner.
This is her first time meeting the family and she is very nervous.
They all sit down and begin eating a fine meal.
The woman is beginning to feel a little discomfort, thanks to her nervou
11.
An elderly man went to the doctor's office to get a double dose of viagra:The doctor told him that he couldn't allow him a double dose.“Why not?” Asked the elderly man.“Because it's not safe.” Replied the doctor.“But I need it really bad.” Said the man.“W
An elderly man went to the doctor's office to get a double dose of viagra:The doctor told him that he couldn't allow him a double dose.“Why not?” Asked the elderly man.“Because it's not safe.” Replied the doctor.“But I need it really bad.” Said the man.“W
12.
A married couple in their early 60s were out celebrating their 35th wedding anniversary in a quiet, romantic little restaurant.
Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table and said,
“For being such an exemplary married couple and fo
A married couple in their early 60s were out celebrating their 35th wedding anniversary in a quiet, romantic little restaurant.
Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table and said,
“For being such an exemplary married couple and fo
13.
A guy is driving around the back woods of Montana and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house.
“Talking Dog For Sale”
He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard.
The guy goes into the back
A guy is driving around the back woods of Montana and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house.
“Talking Dog For Sale”
He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard.
The guy goes into the back
14.
… after taking some time to size Jim up and decide that he can trust him, Carl tells Jim about his plan to escape.“You see, ” Carl says “for the first 5 years I was inside, I trained my digestive system to follow my command. Now I can eat something and i
… after taking some time to size Jim up and decide that he can trust him, Carl tells Jim about his plan to escape.“You see, ” Carl says “for the first 5 years I was inside, I trained my digestive system to follow my command. Now I can eat something and i
15.
Nickname
If Gloria, Suzanne, Debra and Michelle go out for lunch, they will call each other Gloria, Suzanne, Debra and Michelle.
But if Mike, Phil, Rob and Jack go out for a brewsky, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla,
Nickname
If Gloria, Suzanne, Debra and Michelle go out for lunch, they will call each other Gloria, Suzanne, Debra and Michelle.
But if Mike, Phil, Rob and Jack go out for a brewsky, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla,
16.
Nasrudin is walking past a cave when he sees a yogi, deep in meditation, and he asks the yogi what he is searching forThe yogi says:‘I study the animals and have learned many lessons from them that can transform a man's life.'‘A fish once saved my life,'
Nasrudin is walking past a cave when he sees a yogi, deep in meditation, and he asks the yogi what he is searching forThe yogi says:‘I study the animals and have learned many lessons from them that can transform a man's life.'‘A fish once saved my life,'
17.
Jack and Lydia are on holiday in France with their friends, Mike and Anna.Mike loves to visit historical buildingsJack agrees to sightsee some historical buildings with him.Lydia and Anna decide to shop in the city“See you boys when we get back!” the girl
Jack and Lydia are on holiday in France with their friends, Mike and Anna.Mike loves to visit historical buildingsJack agrees to sightsee some historical buildings with him.Lydia and Anna decide to shop in the city“See you boys when we get back!” the girl
18.
A pretty blonde woman is driving down a country road when her car breaks down.She goes to the nearest farmhouse and knocks on the door.When the farmer answers, she says to him,“My car broke down! I don't know what to do! Can I stay here for the night unti
A pretty blonde woman is driving down a country road when her car breaks down.She goes to the nearest farmhouse and knocks on the door.When the farmer answers, she says to him,“My car broke down! I don't know what to do! Can I stay here for the night unti
19.
A young doctor had moved to a small community near Broken Hill to replace a doctor who was retiring.The older doctor suggested that the young one accompany him on his rounds so that the community would become used to their new doctor.At the first house a
A young doctor had moved to a small community near Broken Hill to replace a doctor who was retiring.The older doctor suggested that the young one accompany him on his rounds so that the community would become used to their new doctor.At the first house a
20.
This is the letter that the man wrote to his wife:Dear Wife,I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you foreverI've been a good man to you for 7 years and I have nothing to show for itThese last 2 weeks have been hell…Your boss called to
This is the letter that the man wrote to his wife:Dear Wife,I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you foreverI've been a good man to you for 7 years and I have nothing to show for itThese last 2 weeks have been hell…Your boss called to
21.
A priest and a rabbi operated a church and a synagogue across the street from each other.Since their schedules intertwined, they decided to go in together to buy a car.After the purchase, they drove it home and parked it on the street between them.A few m
A priest and a rabbi operated a church and a synagogue across the street from each other.Since their schedules intertwined, they decided to go in together to buy a car.After the purchase, they drove it home and parked it on the street between them.A few m
22.
A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him, and as he sits, the waitress comes over and asks for their order.The man says, “I'll have a hamburger, fries and a coke,” and turns to the ostrich.“What's yours?” “I'll have the same,” sa
A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him, and as he sits, the waitress comes over and asks for their order.The man says, “I'll have a hamburger, fries and a coke,” and turns to the ostrich.“What's yours?” “I'll have the same,” sa
23.
Three recent college graduates are sitting next to each other on a plane.
The one in the middle turns to the one on the left and engages him in a conversation.
“What did you study in college?”
“I studied theology,” he replied. “After graduating,
Three recent college graduates are sitting next to each other on a plane.
The one in the middle turns to the one on the left and engages him in a conversation.
“What did you study in college?”
“I studied theology,” he replied. “After graduating,
24.
After settling in, she decides to message her friend.“Kate,” she wrote, “I finally moved out of that dingy old office and into a beautiful new one.”Happy to hear this news, Kate orders a bouquet of flowers to send to Jenny's new location.The next day, a b
After settling in, she decides to message her friend.“Kate,” she wrote, “I finally moved out of that dingy old office and into a beautiful new one.”Happy to hear this news, Kate orders a bouquet of flowers to send to Jenny's new location.The next day, a b
25.
When God created the dog, he said: “Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past.
For this, I will give you a lifespan of twenty years.
” The dog replied: “That’s a long time to be barking. How about only ten y
When God created the dog, he said: “Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past.
For this, I will give you a lifespan of twenty years.
” The dog replied: “That’s a long time to be barking. How about only ten y
26.
One of them is extremely smart, one is average, and one is extremely stupid.One day, it is the extremely smart one's turn to catch and cook dinner. He goes out and comes back with a bear.The other two are astounded and ask, “How did you catch this bear?”
One of them is extremely smart, one is average, and one is extremely stupid.One day, it is the extremely smart one's turn to catch and cook dinner. He goes out and comes back with a bear.The other two are astounded and ask, “How did you catch this bear?”
27.
In a train compartment, there are 3 men and a ravishing young girl.
The young girl proposes, “If each of you will give me $1.00, I will show you my legs.”
The men, charmed by this young girl, all pull a buck out of their wallet.
And then the girl
In a train compartment, there are 3 men and a ravishing young girl.
The young girl proposes, “If each of you will give me $1.00, I will show you my legs.”
The men, charmed by this young girl, all pull a buck out of their wallet.
And then the girl
28.
After being married for thirty years, a wife asked her husband to describe her.He looked at her for a while, and then said, “You're A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K.”She asked, “What does that mean?”He said, “Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant,
After being married for thirty years, a wife asked her husband to describe her.He looked at her for a while, and then said, “You're A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K.”She asked, “What does that mean?”He said, “Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant,
29.
James was infatuated with her and knew she wasn't being satisfied by ole crusty.He was caught staring at her longingly more than once and she seemed flattered more than offended so this just reinforced that she was needing something more.One night he drop
James was infatuated with her and knew she wasn't being satisfied by ole crusty.He was caught staring at her longingly more than once and she seemed flattered more than offended so this just reinforced that she was needing something more.One night he drop
30.
According to a 19th century legend, the Truth and the Lie meet one day.The Lie says to the Truth: “It's a marvellous day today”!The Truth looks up to the skies and sighs, for the day was really beautiful.They spend a lot of time together, ultimately arriv
According to a 19th century legend, the Truth and the Lie meet one day.The Lie says to the Truth: “It's a marvellous day today”!The Truth looks up to the skies and sighs, for the day was really beautiful.They spend a lot of time together, ultimately arriv
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